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Mr. Mistoffelees
You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffolees!
The Original Conjuring Cat-
(There can be no doubt about that.)
Please! Listen to me, and don't scoff.
All his inventions are off his own bat!
There's no such Cat in the metropolis; He holds all the patent monopolies
For preforming surprising illusions
And creating eccentric confusions.
The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mister Mistoffolees' conjuring turn!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never!
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
He is quiet, he is small, he is black
From the ears to the tip of his tail;
He can creep through the tiniest crack
He can walk on the narrowest rail.
He can pick any card from a pack,
He is equally cunning with dice;
He is always deceiving you into believing
That he's only hunting for mice! OW!
He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste;
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it is merely misplaced-
You have seen it one moment and then it's gone!
But you find it next week lying on the lawn!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never!
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never!
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
His manner is vague and aloof,
And you would think there was nobody shyer-
But his voice has been heard on the roof
While he was curled up by the fire.
And he has sometimes been heard by the fire
While he was about on the roof-
At least we all heard that somebody purred-
Which is uncontestable proof!
And of his singular magical powers:
Well, I've known the family to call
Him in from the garden for hours,
While he was asleep in the hall.
And not long ago this phenomenal Cat Produced seven kittens right out of a hat!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never!
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And not long ago this phenomenal Cat produced seven kittens right out of a hat!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees!
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the magical, The marvelous, Mr. Mistoffolees!
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